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ADULTERY

 

 

 

We hear a great deal today about the extra-marital relationships indulged in by some of our politicians and church leaders. Yet few people speak out against them, and the individuals themselves seem to think nothing of it. However I want to suggest that there are deep moral and ethical reasons why such people should not be allowed to continue in positions of leadership.

 

There should be no doubt in the mind of every believer that God's law demands an absolute ban on the act of adultery. No Christian should deny this fact, and I am sure I do not have to go into a detailed explanation of what it is. However so that we are all thinking along the same lines it may be useful to have before us a definition:-

 

Adultery is the violation of the marriage vows and the marriage bed, it is unfaithfulness to ones spouse. From this word we have the derivative `adulterate', which means to corrupt, or debase with a mixture of a baser substance. This definition reveals that adultery is a two-fold thing involving both unfaithfulness and corruption.

 

This law is also the head of a family of sin, and has not only a physical application, but also a deep spiritual one. Let us consider both aspects. First of all we should note that this law is a protective law, designed not only to keep us from wrong doing but also  from misery and depression. Whilst living in the USA I listened to a phone-in Counselling Programme. A lady was talking to the Counsellor about her husband who had had an affair. She was saying that since then, he had been miserable and depressed, even though he was glad the affair was over. The reason for this man's condition was ongoing guilt, something that he had yet to come to terms with and get resolved. Prior to the affair, he was a happy, seemingly well-balanced man, but his adultery had caused him deep mood swings.

 

I want to come back to this in a moment, but before doing so, one more thing needs to be mentioned. As you read the Bible it becomes more and more evident that adultery is a vile thing in God's sight, covering all manner of unfaithfulness, so we can say that this law covers an entire family of relationship sins where loyalty, faithfulness and purity are concerned.

 

THE FUNDAMENTAL FAILURE

 

We have already mentioned the misery and depression that adultery causes, so let us think a little more deeply about this matter. An adulterer fails for one reason or another to grasp what it is that makes mankind different from animal kind. We have so embraced the idea that we have evolved from a lower form of animal, that we have all but lost the distinctiveness about human nature. We fail to understand that when God created us, He designed us to function according to a pattern of Laws and Principles which He laid down in the Garden of Eden. Look at Genesis 2:18-25 and notice what He said, ``it is not good that man should be alone.'' Why? Because man was created in the image of God, and, as such, man was imbued with an emotional system, just as is God. It is man's nature to express love, just as God is Love. Now this emotion can only be expressed in a very limited way when the only companions that man has are animals. Love can only truly be expressed when man has someone of his own kind upon whom to lavish love.

 

So it was that God created from the rib of man a woman. Before you start counting your ribs, let me explain. The word Rib simply means curve, and as we all have the same number of ribs it is clear that God did not take a whole rib. As we know from modern science it is theoretically possible to take a small part, a gene, and clone from that another person. So God took from Adam's side that material from which He made woman.

 

This was not Man's only need. God saw that man required a stable and lasting relationship, so in v.24 He commands that the ``Husband cleave to his wife: and they shall be one flesh.'' This is vitally important to our understanding of the subject before us. The word cleave, means to impinge, which in turn means to come into collision with, (some marriages are a constant collision with the two parties constantly fighting and bouncing off each other.) The meaning here therefore, is to come into collision with each other so that they become fast; the collision is of such magnitude that they become fused together, they become one flesh. The cause of that collision we might define as love, an emotion so great that it draws two people together on a collision course, and into an irrevocable and binding relationship, fusing them together as one. In this relationship all of man's emotional needs were designed to be met.

 

Now the man or woman who engages in an adulterous relationship fails to grasp the unique moral distinctive that exists between man and beast. The beast of the field is devoid of the need for a stable emotional and moral relationship. We like to think that animals are able to express emotions such as love and faithfulness, but these are very different from those which humankind has. They are motivated by very different causes, which in general can be described as base appetites. Adultery brings man down to this selfsame base level. Adultery places man in the category of being subject to base desires, appetites and lusts. Whilst an animal is unable to control these base appetites, man is able to exercise control over them. He has a God-given ability to exercise control over his personal and intimate relationships; he has the ability to say `No'.

 

This ability applies not only in respect of extra marital activity, but also in all areas where faithfulness, loyalty and purity are called for. But let us go even deeper, because adultery, extra marital relationships, brings not only serious trouble for the perpetrator as well as the families involved, but also affects the very character of the person. For those who engage in such activity deny and renounce that which is uniquely human. Their human status is denied and they allow animal instincts to take over.

 

 

THE DESTRUCTION OF CHARACTER

 

Let us consider this self destructive force. Of all the self destructive forces that exist, adultery is probably the greatest of them all. Let the Scriptures themselves explain what I mean. Look at Matthew 12:39 and 43-45. Verse 39 sets the scene,” an evil and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign; and there shall be no sign given to it, but the sign of the prophet Jonas.'' The context is adultery, not in the marital sense, but in the more general sense of unfaithfulness or more specifically unfaithfulness in spiritual matters. Verses 43-45, relate to this, and the unclean spirit therefore may be viewed as an adulterous spirit, as the unfaithfulness of that generation is the matter in view.

 

Now notice what happens in respect of this spirit. It opens the door of man's heart to other spirits, so that the man's state progressively get worse. ``When the unclean spirit is gone out of man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none. Then he saith, I will return into my house from whence I came out, and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept and garnished. Then goeth he, and taketh with him seven other spirits, more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there; and the last state of that man is worse than the first” Now whilst the principle here can apply to all the Commandments, it applies in a very powerful way to the one before us and shows the destruction of an unfaithful man's character. One evil spirit goes out and brings seven others back with him.

This should not surprise us when we consider that someone who is engaged in an adulterous relationship will begin to do things that hitherto he would not have thought about doing. One sinful action, leads to a multiplicity of sinful actions. Someone, be they male or female, who is engaged in an adulterous relationship will of necessity begin to lie. Prior to this affair, the person may well have been an open, upright and honest man, but the affair will cause him to lie. He will lie to his wife as to his whereabouts, he will engage in deceitful acts, he will begin to live a life of duplicity, he will begin to steal from his wife and family, taking from them time, money and love that should be theirs and theirs alone.

 

Then conceit will enter into the arena, as he thinks that he is clever enough to be able to live this double life without detection. Pride, vanity and of course lust are all very much part of this developing character, each thing like interest at the bank, compounding one upon the other. He is then unable to look his wife in the eye; he can no longer be honest in his dealings with her. Soon others knowingly or unknowingly become embroiled in the adulterer's nefarious activities, as he calls on them to cover for him. All of this points in some measure to the destruction of a man's character. He is no longer a man who can be trusted.

 

You see these people made binding promises on the occasion of their marriage, not only to each other, but also in the presence of others. In a Christian marriage, they invoke the Lord to bless the union, and promise before Him to live in the holy estate of matrimony. Adultery violates these sacred vows, tramples them in the dust as though they are worthless. Adultery is an abuse of the special and sacred covenant that was made by the two covenanting partners.

 

Now let us put it even more pointedly, an adulterer can no longer be seen as a trustworthy person. That may sound hard, but I would rather trust a thief, than I would an adulterer. Why? Because if a man or woman, no matter who they are, is prepared to sink to such depths in respect of this sacred union, they will become easy prey for lesser betrayals. A thief may not be trusted with money, but he may be trusted with other things. There may truly be `Honour Among Thieves', but an adulterer, is not to be trusted because he is a man who cannot keep his word.

 

For this reason, it is vital that people who hold public office, should be faithful to their spouses. It is vital for the well being of all that if a public servant be he a president, prime minister, a member of the government or just a local official, is found out in an adulterous affair, he or she should either resign or be dismissed. That person is no longer trustworthy, their character has not only been discredited, but it has been destroyed. It is for this reason that men who act in an adulterous fashion must resign from office for their actions have destroyed their credibility as trustworthy leaders. If a wife or husband cannot trust their spouse, then how can the public?

 

See it like this; if a public servant is prepared to betray his marriage partner, how much more readily and easily will he be prepared to betray a lesser trust. So we see that the violation of this law, brings with it far more than was at first envisaged by the adulterer. Those who embark on such activity find themselves on a downward and deepening spiral, one that brings misery not only to themselves and to those who are directly involved in the matter, but to all whom the affair touches.

 

So we are able to see from these things how this law broadens out and affects us all, either directly or indirectly.

 

THE THOUGHT PROCESS

 

Matthew 5:27-28 “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery; but I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath  committed adultery with her already in his heart.'' Then in Matthew 19:9. ``I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery; and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.'' We have here two very powerful verses, and although it is not my intention to apply the latter, because it is self explanatory, I do want to look at the first, where Jesus speaks of heart adultery.

 

This is not spiritual adultery, which is something quite different. This statement still comes under the physically moral aspect. Jesus is speaking to His disciples, so what we have is His pastoral counsel to us. It is almost certain that they had imbibed the teaching of the Pharisees in respect of this law, which was that so long as you don't do it, everything else is all right. The basic idea was that this law related only to the external physical act. Jesus says ``No, they have got it all wrong, this law affects the thoughts, it affects the inward desires, it applies to the imagination of the mind.'' Jesus is declaring that those who indulge in wanton and uncontrolled thoughts in respect of the opposite sex, are guilty of breaking this law. In God's sight, even though outwardly they have lived a faithful life with their wives, they are guilty of violating this commandment.

 

Such was the crime of David, when he saw Bathsheba. That one single thought led to the actual act, then to lies, to deceit and eventually murder. It led to the destruction of David's character, so much so that God would not allow him to build the Temple. We are taught here that there is such a thing as heart adultery, things that may never defile the body, but defile the heart. We hear a great deal today about the way that violent and sexually explicit films and videos affect our children, causing them to want to enact what they have seen. Often what we think also has the same effect.

 

The main point is that this law is not only concerned about the defilement and debauchment of the body, but is also deeply concerned with the defilement and debauchment of the heart and mind. This is why it is so important that we guard our minds and eyes from that which is intentionally designed to corrupt. Mental sin is just as grievous as the physical act.

 

SPIRITUAL ADULTERY

 

Adultery is the betrayal of a relationship. The Lord entered into a relationship with Israel, which He equated to that of marriage. In Jeremiah 3:8-9 we find that because of Israel's unfaithfulness to Him He gave her a divorce on the grounds of adultery with idols and false religions. Today much of the professing church is engaging in similar relationships, being unfaithful to the Lord and to the faith once delivered unto the saints. This can be seen in the Ecumenical and Multifaith movements, along with the newer Promise Keepers movement. This aspect of adultery needs deeper study and application. However let us be constantly aware that as Christians we are the Lord's, purchased by His blood for His glory.

 

                                                                                                                                                                                              Dr. P J Gadsden